The Church

My pastor fell. He fell hard. 

He fell in the most public way possible, and what makes it worse is that he actually committed the crimes he's accused of. My heart has been broken for months about it, and it's taken me that amount of time to write this whole article. 

He was indicted last week, and he turned himself in to Oklahoma authorities today. I’ve already seen at least 7 articles about the story posted just today. 

I started attending Gateway Church in 2007. From the moment I stepped foot on their Southlake Campus, it was home. The worship was moving, and every sermon--whether it was Senior Pastor Robert Morris, Preston Morrison, Tim Ross, Tom Lane, or any guest speaker--spoke directly to my heart. I took voracious notes each week. I have volumes of sermon notes on my bookcase in my bedroom. Soon after joining the church, Gateway started expanding to satellite campuses. The NRH Campus opened, which was much closer to our home, so we started attending this campus, and I soon started to volunteer. I have fond memories of being pregnant with my second daughter and greeting newcomers to the church.

After the birth of my daughter, we moved to the other side of town, and we went back to attending the Southlake Campus, but this time, it was a newer building across the highway from the old church. I again started volunteering in the children's check-in. I would help parents check their children in to the children's services. When my older daughter was about 7 or 8, we volunteered together to be greeters. I continued to volunteer in various capacities for over a decade. 

When my husband left in 2013, I dove into the church and all they had to offer. I went to Divorce Care, a Bible study and fellowship support and recovery group where recently divorced people could come together and learn God's plan for their lives, be encouraged and prayed over and for. Gateway had a single parent family ministry, and we met on Monday nights. They served us dinner, and offered childcare while the adults had a message, fellowship or classes. I eventually became a leader in the SPF ministry, and I felt like I was fulfilling part of the calling God had on my life.

Gateway Church also offered Freedom Ministries. They had classes and conferences where you could break free of generational curses, inner vows and demonic forces over your life. I went to every one that I could. I attended Kairos, a freedom conference meant to deep-dive into your traumas and offer healing. We had Pink Impact, which was a women's conference, every spring. I also went on three separate mission trips with Gateway. The first trip was to Guatemala. We ministered to women and single mothers there. Seeing their abject poverty, but their ease in praising the Lord brought me to my knees. The next year, I went with Gateway to Belize, and the following year, I was chosen as the leader on a mission trip to Mexico. On all three of these mission trips, I got to see first-hand how much Gateway pours into other countries and the people who live there. 

I became a Life Group leader, as well. I hosted a group of singles at my home on Sunday nights for a Bible study and fellowship. During this time is also when I started this blog. While in a Sunday morning service, we were singing Bethel's "Raise a Hallelujah," and the lyrics said, "Up from the ashes, Hope will arise. Death is defeated/the King is alive." I knew then this website was to be called "Up From the Ashes." 

Throughout the years, I credit Gateway Church with facilitating my healing and being able to get back on God's path for my life. If it weren't for Gateway, their pastors and their ministries, I genuinely don't know where I would be in life. 

Recently, some information has come to light about Gateway's senior and founding pastor, Robert Morris. Pastor Robert was always transparent about the fact that prior to his coming to the Lord, he was, in his words, "very immoral." He was never specific about his immorality, but he told his congregation on more than one occasion about how he sought forgiveness and redemption. I have no doubt that he truly repented and used his platform for good. Because I am a testament to that goodness. 

The things Robert did were criminal. The people who covered it up should be held accountable, too. I also know that I would never want my most heinous acts to be reported on by every major news outlet in Texas. The public may never forgive Robert Morris, and unfortunately, Gateway Church may never be able to recover. However, what I want people to remember that our faith is in God, not man. I want people to remember that even through his sin, God still used a tragic situation and turned it into a ministry where He was heralded. God used the brokenness to bring healing. He made beauty from the ashes.